Posture is the Problem

Listen to this while reading

I know my posture is a problem
but I still sit in the middle of my bed with a curved spine
Know I feel worse off if I linger in my movements,
but slowness is easier to succumb to

Or maybe it’s speed that’s magnetic,
pulling me closer, because these days are racing by
and I felt like a child only a moment ago, and now
I feel archaic, like my memories are from another lifetime
and my body doesn’t want to forgive me anymore

I’m angry at my nerves, the nervous ones and
the ones that make my hands shake even in the calm
They steal time, and I don’t want to run out
I don’t want to forget,
They steal the words that I’m desperate to write

The world is a strange place, it does not consider
the timing when it gives way to disaster
Someone’s home is burning while another
life is just beginning
Someone’s heart is sinking while
another is solely admiring the stars

I’m always afraid to miss out, I think that’s why I plan so intently
try to manage my way into the best outcome
losing less, lacking less, feeling more and being more

Some mornings I wake up and feel like my mind never slept,
the day is just a continuation of moments and when night hits
I’ve all the sudden run out of time

If you hang around me long enough you’ll probably hear me say,
life is a mist, here for a moment gone in the next
and I say it aloud so I remember
that every piece of an hour is to be intentional
and don’t let me get too carried away by the responsibility of that notion
Be grounded, but come up for air
Be sane, but let your mind go
Be aware, but don’t be so hard on yourself
Life is a mist, here for a moment gone in the next

When Joy is out of focus,
I have to remind my heart that it is happy
Dissuaded by external circumstance,
I play games of comparison to remember its former discontent
But happiness is not the goal here,
so I thank God and stop looking so deeply within
so I thank God and let myself breathe,
so I thank God and thank God that I can believe


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