i’m not sure how i fell into this

mess

not sure how the events always line up to

this.

i have spent every minute of this day locked beneath my sheets and various blankets which date back to 1997 and christmas time this year, i have gotten up solely to refill my glass of water and visit the bathroom. from there i would leave staring at my pale, solid face and the reflection it so harshly offered back to me and i could not help but to lock gazes with my own eyes, which on their own offer up so many questions and mysteries unsolved. as i continued to search my soul in this reflection (which happens to become strangely unfamiliar when stared at for too long) i became weary in every way and decided i must return to my bed quickly, before i let my thoughts devour me, i would rather lose myself in a documentary of Kurt Cobain’s death- these mysteries of life become much more comforting when compared to the mysteries of what is directly in front of you, what you hold in your own hand and in your own eyes becomes much more terrifying than what the past possesses.. but i am sure that these sour colors and mixed up fabrics will be bright again, and the sunlight will fill this room again, and the pictures will unfurl as the adventures unfold and all will feel whole again, sometimes it’s necessary to document the nonsense in my mind before it becomes too much like the truth, and justify the cycle of life before it decides to retreat forever.